I have been the culprit in rejecting many online dates.I have also been the victim, the one left rejected, confused and staring at my screen wondering what happened.A couple of days later, she saw his picture on Facebook under “people you may know.” She looked at his profile to discover he had a very current girlfriend. Don’t take the dating world too seriously, especially when it’s online and you just met someone new.
No one gave me a blue print on how to find a relationship when I decided I wanted a girlfriend when I was 18. That for me was one of the most important things I could do.Than, one day, a bomb dropped on my lap while having a talk with one of my mentees. “Kerry, how do you expect ME to be successful in a relationship when you, my mentor, are single?” I had the biggest lump in my throat for the next few seconds. There are too many Elliot Rodger types in our midst, so incapable of dealing with rejection that their skewed perspective leads to needless tragedy – on a small or large scale. But you shouldn’t try to make sure she’s hurting, too, by lashing out emotionally (and certainly not physically). We have no more right to a woman’s time & affection that we do to Harvard granting us unconditional admission. Do you think she’s going to hear you call her a stuck-up bitch and say, “Oh, maybe I was wrong about him. How we handle rejection in our romantic lives is a good barometer of how well we’ll adapt when our personal or professional goals meet resistance, too. Because let’s face it: male rage is a very real problem for women in today’s world. And while the burden of initiation still appears to rest mostly on the shoulders of men, that burden doesn’t entitle us to expect compliance for putting our necks out there. A strong man doesn’t fly into a rage when things don’t go as planned. If she already was leaning away from you, you’re not exactly making her change her impression of you by freaking out and getting angry. Or when we fall prey to layoffs during a bad economy and find ourselves unexpectedly unemployed?